Single And Smiling (Part 2)

January 23 19:34 2013 Print This Article

Readers, you are most welcome to this continuation of the discussion with the theme: Single And Smiling, which we began last week. In this (part 2) series, we will be highlighting the positive and perhaps the negative impact of the demands of traditional engagement, which made marriage the “man’s world”. Happy reading!

Now the question is if you had the liberty of choosing between being a Nigerian Lady who’s single and smiling and a western lady of the same status which would it be?

Let’s examine the pros and the cons.

There’s a wide spread rumour which confirmed that “single and smiling” is most celebrated discuss among Nigerian ladies of the eastern extraction. This syndrome is not just attributed to family choice of who’s fit enough to take their daughter’s hands in marriage among suitors. The most eligible is deemed fit, possibly a successful business man irrespective of his educational status; in as much as he can afford the hugh sum charged as dowry.

This is not where it gets scary, dear reader, the dowry in question is directly proportional to the educational status of the lady in question, if this were the case, is love enough reason to buy into this culture?

The highest bidder or the favourite of the ladies family gets to go home with the goody bag, where’s the Love? Is this poverty or parental guardians?

Although the scenario as painted above clearly presents a case where the family is the sole determinant of the union between a woman and a man as defined by the African culture, because it doesn’t really matter whether she brings him home or he’s part of the bazaar, he gets to meet up with the whole traditional rights.

A ceremony that would afford both families the opportunity of getting to appreciate the nobility of both families or otherwise one or more of the following reasons:

A. If there is a peculiar family ailment, in most cases, madness.

B. Their educational status.

C. To study their character.

D. To study the psychological maturity of the visiting family with the aim of knowing whether they are capable of catering for the needs of the lady, and on the other hand to know if she has the wit to cater for a home.

After all this you’ll find out that a traditional marriage puts the man in a position where he’s lord, he lords over the wife, his decisions are final, he has no reason to apologise for his actions as in simple terms. In Africa, Nigeria specifically, it is a Man’s world

Jessica Effiong is the CEO of Skyberg Services
email:info@skybergservices.com

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